Markie went back to Canada on 7th Feb. It has been ultra weird without him being arround me nearly 24 hours a day. Everyone has been supportive and kind to me and asking me how he is. Then I have had to content with people who have assumed because I have not gone to Canada that we have split up. This is not the case, I dont like to move somewhere unprepared and visa-less not to mention I have tons of photograph work lined up, you cant just say to people oh by the way Im leaving erm sorry muchly about the photo sessions you have booked. Yeah thats SOOO the way to do it NOT!
Mark is amazing person, through and through - he has his failings and so do I. I decided to make sure I was the best I can and focus on the goals I had for myself which sorta took a back seat - generally when you get married that just happens. I decided after praying that the best thing was to focus on service and goals - to keep myself busy and full. I really am happy in the fact that I am achieving these goals already. Im taking a course just online but always good to keep the brain working, losing weight, reading books I sorta lost track of OH I READ SO MUCH! Also my personal photography projects. (more to come on those)
So whats happening with Mark? Hes back at home in St Thomas keeping himself busy also looking for work and getting himself set up....and here I sit waiting and writing about it. Things are constantly changing. Some changes I welcome and love and respect and others I cry or get mad about...but change needs to happen. Thats why we are here!
Im really thankful for eternal marriage and that this time is just brief in the long scale of things. People ask if I miss him and yes I do some days - but you have to not wallow, just get on with it and before you know the times gone and your onto the next chapter of life. Im really thankful for good friends and family though who are supporting me and being there when I just want to talk. Those are the things I need most of all. A listener not someone to tell me what I should do or when I should do it. I already know - the Lord tells me!
Anyway Ill leave with a couple photos of Mark the day he left. Our last photos together for a while. Love you Mark :-)
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2 comments:
I admire you so much. There are too many people who think once they're married all their dreams and wishes should get put aside! Heavenly Father created us for a purpose- and we each have our own destiny, which he directs us towards! Would rather do what he wants me to do then do what everyone else expects!! :) xx
You are so lovely! That's all that counts :). I don't know Mark so I can't speak for him but if he is married to you then he must be the same :).
The truth is that every marriage is hard work, no matter what the dynamics of it. The fact that you two are in this situation makes it much harder. And I think it's great that through all that you still see a good side. This will build you up for the things you will face in life and I say that through my own experiences; life can really kick you in the face at times, but it's never just a coincidence.
P.S People are so rude! They will say things straight off the cuff without even thinking and it hurts like all heck but the best thing you have done is get on with your life and setting about working on yourself :) kudos to you, girl! Keep being you - awesome to the core! :D
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